We’ve all been there. You get a notification that your kid just spent three hours on a YouTube rabbit hole of Skibidi Toilet theories. Your first instinct? Digital Police Mode. You want to lock the phone, set a 15-minute timer, and maybe throw the router out the window.

But here’s the reality of 2025: policing is reactive; mentoring is proactive.

A digital mentor doesn't just watch the logs; they sit on the couch and ask, "Wait, why is that camera-headed guy fighting a toilet? Is this actually funny or just loud?" Mentorship is about building a "proximity at a distance"—being the person they come to when they see something "sus" (suspicious) instead of the person they’re trying to bypass with a VPN.

If you rely solely on surveillance, you’re in an arms race you will eventually lose. By middle school, most kids know how to use "incognito" modes, "trap phones" (cheap burners traded at school), or just "vibe coding" their way around filters.

When we act like the police, we create a "gotcha" culture. Kids learn that the goal isn't to be safe; the goal is to not get caught.

Research shows that high-surveillance parenting often leads to kids who are less capable of managing their own digital lives once they leave the house. If they’ve never had to exercise the "no" muscle themselves because an app always did it for them, they’re essentially digital toddlers when they hit college.

Check out our guide on why kids find workarounds to parental controls

To be a mentor, you have to speak the language—or at least not look like you’re having a glitch when they use it.

In late 2025, the slang has shifted. If your kid says something is "Ohio," they mean it’s weird or cringey. If they’re "aura farming," they’re trying to act cool or mysterious to gain social clout. And yes, Skibidi Toilet is still a thing, even if it feels like "brain rot" to us.

The Mentor Move: Don't judge the weirdness. Every generation has its "brain rot" (remember Ren & Stimpy or Teletubbies?). Instead, acknowledge it. "I see you're gaining major aura with that Minecraft build." It sounds ridiculous, but it signals that you’re paying attention to their world without trying to shut it down.

The best way to mentor is to co-consume. Instead of just handing over a tablet, find media that actually builds the skills they need—like critical thinking, entrepreneurship, and emotional regulation.

Is it a bank-account-draining machine? Often, yes. But it’s also a massive platform for entrepreneurship and game design. Mentor Move: Ask them to explain the "economy" of their favorite game. Why do people want that specific skin? Is it worth the real-world money? This is a "canon event" for learning financial literacy.

This is the ultimate "cozy game." It teaches patience, resource management, and social dynamics. It’s the perfect antidote to the high-stress "rage bait" content found on TikTok. Mentor Move: Play a co-op farm together. It’s a low-stakes way to talk about life while you’re both watering digital parsnips.

A "roguelike" game where you die... a lot. But the story only progresses when you fail. It’s a masterclass in persistence and dealing with frustration. Mentor Move: Talk about the "flop era." When things go wrong in the game, how do they handle the reset?

A beautiful exploration of AI, nature, and what it means to belong. It’s a great bridge to talk about how technology (like the robot) interacts with our human world. Mentor Move: Watch it together and ask, "If a robot can learn to be a parent, what does that say about how we use AI today?"

Ask our chatbot for more age-appropriate alternatives to "brain rot" shows

Being a mentor doesn't mean "no rules." It means transparent boundaries.

Our kids are digital natives, but they aren't digital experts. They have the "rizz" (charisma) to navigate the platforms, but they don't have the prefrontal cortex to handle the algorithms.

They don't need a warden; they need a guide. Someone who knows that a "sigma" isn't just a Greek letter and that Roblox is basically a digital shopping mall where you occasionally get "scammed" for a neon dog.

When you move from Digital Police to Digital Mentor, you stop being the obstacle and start being the ally. And in the long run, an ally is the only person a teenager will actually listen to.

Learn more about how to have a real conversation about digital habits