When Harry Met Sally – WISE Score & Parent Review | Screenwise

When Harry Met Sally

Name: Screenwise
Author: Screenwise

movie1989

62%

WISE Score

Avg. Tomatometer

The rom-com that asks if men and women can be friends—with a LOT of talk about why they might want to be more.

7.7/10

88%

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When Harry Met Sally

movie

R, 1989

62%

WISE Score

Avg. Tomatometer

The rom-com that asks if men and women can be friends—with a LOT of talk about why they might want to be more.

7.7

88%

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Screenwise Verdict

When Harry Met Sally is a genuinely well-crafted romantic comedy with sharp writing, great chemistry, and real insight into adult relationships. If you're watching with a 16- or 17-year-old who's ready for frank conversations about sex and romance, it holds up.

But let's be clear: this is not a family movie. The sexual discussion is constant—orgasms, sleeping arrangements, relationship mechanics—and while it's played for humor and intelligence rather than shock value, it's firmly adult content. The famous deli scene alone is enough to make things awkward if you're watching with anyone under 15.

For adults, it's a charming, quotable classic. For teens, it's a maybe—depending on maturity and your family's comfort with sexual frankness. For kids? Absolutely not. And honestly, even for teens, the 1989 aesthetic and gender dynamics might feel like watching your parents' VHS collection. It's good, but it's not exactly must-see for Gen Z.

Age Fit

This is for older teens (16+) and adults. The sexual content isn't graphic, but it's constant and frank—not something you want a 10-year-old overhearing. For mature high schoolers interested in smart romantic comedies, it's a classic. For younger kids, it's a hard pass.

WISE Breakdown

Wholesome

A warm, witty exploration of adult friendship and romance with genuine emotional depth. The central relationship models honest communication and real vulnerability. However, roughly a quarter of the dialogue revolves around sex—not gratuitously, but as part of adult conversations about relationships. The famous deli orgasm scene is played for comedy but is still quite explicit in concept. One parent review mentions a scene of 'domestic/dating violence' that could normalize unhealthy behavior. It's emotionally healthy for mature teens and adults, but the sexual frankness and relationship dynamics are firmly adult territory.

Imaginative

Nora Ephron's script is sharp, quotable, and structurally clever—following Harry and Sally across 12 years with seasonal vignettes and those delightful interview segments with real couples. The central question 'Can men and women be friends?' was fresh in 1989 and sparked real cultural conversation. The dialogue crackles with wit and observational humor. But it's not visually inventive or conceptually bold—it's a traditional rom-com that executes its formula exceptionally well rather than reinventing it.

Safe

This is an adult romantic comedy with adult content throughout. About 25% of conversation is explicitly about sex—orgasms, sleeping arrangements, relationship mechanics. The iconic deli scene involves Meg Ryan loudly faking an orgasm in public. There's moderate profanity, social drinking, and at least one concerning moment of relationship conflict that parents flagged as potentially normalizing dating violence. No nudity or graphic content, but the sexual discussion is constant and frank. Common Sense Media rates it 16+, which feels right—this isn't something that should surprise a kid who wanders into the living room.

Enriching

For older teens and adults, this is genuinely enriching—it explores friendship, timing, vulnerability, and the messy reality of adult relationships with intelligence and humor. The film asks real questions about compatibility, emotional intimacy, and whether romantic love can coexist with deep friendship. The writing is smart enough to spark good conversations about relationships and communication. That said, it's entertainment first—you're not learning a skill or gaining practical knowledge, you're watching two charming people figure out their feelings over 96 minutes.

Parent Info

✓

Why It Might Be Great

Nora Ephron's script is witty, quotable, and genuinely smart about adult relationships and timing
Models a deep, honest friendship that evolves—shows vulnerability and real communication between partners
The chemistry between Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan is effortless and charming
Structurally clever with its 12-year timeline and real-couple interview segments
For older teens, it's a solid entry point into conversations about friendship, romance, and emotional intimacy

⚠

What to Watch For

Constant, frank discussion about sex—about 25% of the dialogue revolves around orgasms, sleeping together, and relationship mechanics
The famous deli orgasm scene is hilarious but very explicit in concept
Some profanity and social drinking throughout
At least one moment of relationship conflict that parents flagged as potentially concerning (dating violence)
Very 1989—the fashion, the landlines, the gender dynamics may feel like a time capsule

Conversation Starters

"Do you think men and women can really be 'just friends'? Why or why not?"
"Harry and Sally had such different personalities—what do you think made their friendship work?"
"The movie shows them meeting at different life stages. How do you think timing affects relationships?"
"What do you think makes a good romantic partner versus a good friend? Are they different?"

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