The Kickstarter Experiment Gone Wrong
Back in 2013, The Canyons was a massive talking point. It was supposed to be a middle finger to the studio system—a movie funded by fans, written by the guy who gave us American Psycho, and directed by the man who wrote Taxi Driver. On paper, it was a fascinating exercise in digital-age filmmaking. In practice, it was a train wreck.
The film follows Christian (James Deen), a trust-fund movie producer who spends his time organizing four-way sexual encounters and manipulating his girlfriend, Tara (Lindsay Lohan). When he finds out Tara is having an affair, things get 'thriller-ish,' but the tension never actually lands. Instead, we get long scenes of people staring blankly at iPhones in cold, modern mansions.
Why it failed
The problem isn't just the content—it's the craft. The cinematography feels like a high-end real estate video, and the performances are wildly uneven. Lohan occasionally shows flashes of the talent that made her a star, but she's often left hanging by a script that prioritizes shock over substance.
"The characters are one-dimensional and as appealing as bugs in a rundown motel."
That quote from the Roger Ebert review sums it up. There is no one to root for, and nothing to learn. It’s a movie about the 'death of cinema' that almost feels like it's trying to kill cinema itself. Unless you're doing a deep dive into Paul Schrader's career arc, save your 99 minutes.
