Dash & Lily: Is This Netflix Holiday Rom-Com Right for Your Tween?
TL;DR: This charming 8-episode Netflix series follows two NYC teens trading dares through a red notebook during the holidays. It's genuinely sweet with witty banter, but includes some drinking, sexual references, and moderate language that puts it firmly in the 13+ range. If your 11-12 year old is mature and you're comfortable with PG-13 content, it could work with co-viewing. Younger than that? Skip it for now.
Quick content flags: Moderate language (occasional "shit," "bitch"), teen drinking at parties, sexual references and kissing, some bullying/mean girl behavior, brief vomit scene.
Dash & Lily is a Netflix holiday rom-com series based on the YA novel "Dash & Lily's Book of Dares" by Rachel Cohn and David Levithan. The show follows Dash, a cynical bookworm who hates Christmas, and Lily, an optimistic holiday enthusiast who loves everything about the season. They meet-cute through a red notebook left in the Strand bookstore, trading increasingly elaborate dares and getting to know each other without actually meeting face-to-face.
It's basically a millennial/Gen-Z take on "You've Got Mail" but with a notebook instead of email, set against the backdrop of a sparkly New York City Christmas. Think quirky indie rom-com energy with strong "Gilmore Girls" fast-talking dialogue vibes.
The show nails that sweet spot of being genuinely romantic without being cringeworthy. The leads are likable, the chemistry works even when they're not on screen together, and the whole notebook dare concept is honestly brilliant—it's the kind of thing that makes kids want to try it themselves (which, honestly, is pretty wholesome as far as media influence goes).
The New York City setting during the holidays is gorgeous and aspirational. The show features diverse characters, including Lily's gay uncles and a subplot about her brother's interracial relationship that feels natural rather than preachy. The humor is clever without trying too hard, and the emotional beats land without being manipulative.
Plus, it's only 8 episodes at about 25-30 minutes each, so it doesn't overstay its welcome. Perfect for a holiday binge.
Language
This is probably the biggest sticking point for younger viewers. The show includes:
- Multiple uses of "shit" and "damn"
- Occasional "bitch" and "ass"
- Some sexual innuendo and crude jokes
- One character uses "Jesus Christ" as an exclamation
It's not constant, but it's there. If you're strict about language, this will bother you. If you're okay with PG-13 movie language, you'll survive.
Romance and Sexual Content
The romance is the whole point, so let's break it down:
- Lots of kissing (nothing graphic, but it's there)
- Sexual references and innuendo throughout
- Characters discuss sex and relationships
- Teen characters attend parties where couples are making out
- Some suggestive dancing
- References to Dash's ex-girlfriend and their physical relationship
- A character jokes about "getting laid"
No nudity, no sex scenes, but the show definitely acknowledges that these are teenagers who think about sex and relationships. It's handled with more maturity than awkwardness, which is refreshing but also means it's not for younger kids.
Drinking and Substance Use
- Multiple scenes at teen parties with alcohol
- Characters drink beer and mixed drinks
- One character gets drunk and vomits (it's played for comedy but it's gross)
- Parents are shown drinking wine
- No drug use
The drinking isn't glorified exactly, but it's also not condemned. It's just... there, as part of the teen party scene. If you want to have conversations about teen drinking and peer pressure
, this could actually be a decent jumping-off point.
Other Concerns
- Some bullying and mean girl behavior (particularly toward Lily)
- Anxiety and social awkwardness are major themes
- Family conflict and divorced parents
- A character deals with feeling abandoned by a parent
- Brief vomit scene (visual, not just audio)
- Some mild physical comedy/slapstick
Ages 13+: This is the sweet spot. The content aligns with what most 13-14 year olds are seeing in PG-13 movies, and the themes of first love, finding yourself, and dealing with family expectations are perfectly timed for this age group.
Ages 11-12: Depends entirely on your kid and your family values. If your tween:
- Has watched PG-13 movies comfortably
- Is mature enough to handle sexual references without giggling through the whole thing
- You're willing to co-view and discuss
- You're okay with the language
Then it could work. But if you're on the fence, wait a year. It's not going anywhere.
Ages 10 and under: Hard pass. The content is too mature, and honestly, they won't get the humor or emotional nuance anyway. Stick with Dash & Lily for later and check out The Christmas Chronicles or Klaus for holiday viewing now.
Here's the thing that surprised me: this show is genuinely well-made. The writing is sharp, the performances are committed without being over-the-top, and it treats its characters with respect.
Lily could have been written as a manic pixie dream girl cliché, but she's given real depth, anxiety, and family complications. Dash could have been insufferable, but his cynicism comes from a real place of hurt. The supporting characters—Lily's brother Langston, Dash's ex Sofia, Lily's best friend—all feel like actual people rather than plot devices.
The show also does something rare: it makes New York City feel magical without being unrealistic about it. Yes, there are sparkly lights and ice skating, but there's also crowded subways and expensive coffee and the reality of navigating a big city as a teenager.
If you're trying to gauge whether this is right for your family, here's how it compares:
- More mature than: Heartstopper (which is genuinely wholesome), Never Have I Ever Season 1
- Less mature than: Sex Education, Euphoria (obviously), Outer Banks
- Similar vibe to: Early seasons of Gilmore Girls, To All the Boys I've Loved Before
If you do watch with your tween/teen, here are some discussion points:
- About the notebook dares: What would you do if you found a notebook like that? What kind of dares would you create?
- About Dash's cynicism: Why do you think he hates Christmas? Is it really about the holiday or something else?
- About Lily's anxiety: How does she handle social situations? What coping strategies does she use?
- About the drinking scenes: What do you notice about how alcohol is portrayed? How do the characters act differently when drinking?
- About family expectations: Both characters struggle with what their families want vs. what they want. Can you relate?
Dash & Lily is a delightful holiday rom-com that's well-crafted and genuinely charming, but it's firmly in teen territory. The Netflix rating of TV-14 is accurate. If your kid is 13+, this is a great holiday watch that's way better than most teen content out there. If they're younger, the language and sexual references make it a skip for now.
The good news? If you do decide to wait, the book series is slightly less explicit and could be a good middle ground for mature 11-12 year olds who are strong readers. Check out the Dash & Lily book series if you want to test the waters before committing to the show.
And if you're looking for holiday movies and shows for younger kids, there are plenty of options that won't require you to have the "what does 'getting laid' mean?" conversation over hot chocolate.
If you're still deciding: Watch the first episode yourself. You'll know within 20 minutes if this is right for your family. The content is pretty consistent throughout, so if episode one works, the rest will too.
If you're watching together: Make it a thing. Pop some popcorn, get cozy, and be ready to pause for questions or discussions. The episode length makes it easy to do one or two at a time.
If you decide to skip it: Bookmark it for later. This is a show that will still be good in a year or two when your kid is ready. And in the meantime, check out age-appropriate holiday content that won't give you content anxiety.