TL;DR: Gaming friend requests are the new "Can you come out and play?" but with higher stakes. Most are harmless kids looking for teammates, but some are "tricky people" or scammers. The goal isn't to ban friends—it's to teach your kid to vet them.

Quick Links for the "Big Three" Social Games:

If you’ve walked past your kid’s room lately and heard them yelling about someone being "lowkey mid" or calling a move "so Ohio," you know the social landscape has shifted. For our kids, games aren't just games; they are the primary place they hang out.

Getting a friend request in Roblox or Fortnite feels like a hit of dopamine. It’s validation. But as parents, we see that "User4928" notification and our internal alarm bells go off. Is this a kid from 3rd-period gym, or a 40-year-old in a basement?

The reality is usually somewhere in the middle, but navigating it requires more than just "stranger danger" talks. We need to teach "digital discernment."

Before we talk about the risks, we have to understand the "why." In Roblox, having a long friend list is often a status symbol—it’s like having a lot of followers on Instagram. In Fortnite, you literally cannot play certain modes effectively without a "squad."

Sometimes, it’s about the "grind." Kids will "friend" someone because that person has a rare skin or is a high-level player who can help them level up. It’s less about deep connection and more about a transactional partnership. Is it entrepreneurship? Maybe a little. Is it also a way to get "scammed" out of digital items? Absolutely.

How do you help your kid tell the difference? We like to use the "Tricky People" framework. We don't want to scare them into thinking every avatar is a monster, but we want them to spot behavior that feels "off."

The Green Flags (Real Connection):

The Red Flags (The "Tricky" Stuff):

Learn more about identifying grooming behaviors in online games

Ages 6-9: The "Walled Garden" Phase At this age, the answer to "Can I add this person?" should almost always be "Do you know them in real life?"

Ages 10-12: The "Training Wheels" Phase This is when the "Skibidi Toilet" memes are peak and the social pressure to be online hits hard.

Ages 13+: The "Trust but Verify" Phase By now, they’re likely in Fortnite or Valorant.

We get asked a lot if Roblox is actually teaching kids about business. Some kids do learn basic coding in Lua or how to trade items. But the "friend" system is often where the "money pit" starts.

"Friendship" in these games is often tied to "gifting." Your kid might feel pressured to buy a "gift" for a digital friend to stay in the group. Check out our guide on how Robux is in fact real money

Don't lead with a lecture. Lead with curiosity.

By asking them to "teach" you their process, you get to see their logic—and gently correct it if they’re being too loose with their privacy.

Most games have "Privacy" or "Social" tabs in the settings menu. You can usually toggle:

Read our step-by-step guide on Roblox parental controls See how to manage privacy settings in Fortnite

Gaming friend requests aren't inherently evil. They are the digital version of meeting a kid at the park. Most of the time, they just want to play tag. But because there’s a screen involved, the "park" is infinite and sometimes adults are wandering around in kid costumes.

The goal isn't to keep your kid in a bubble—it's to give them the "armor" of skepticism. If they know how to spot a "tricky person" and feel comfortable hitting the "Block" button, they’re already ahead of the curve.

Next Steps: