Name: Screenwise
Author: Screenwise

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Screenwise Verdict

Let's be real: The Haunted Mansion is not good. With a 14% on Rotten Tomatoes and a 5.2 on IMDb, this is one of those Disney misfires that looked great on paper (Eddie Murphy! Theme park ride! Spooky fun!) but completely faceplanted in execution.

The comedy is painfully dated—early-2000s slapstick that makes you cringe more than laugh. The scares are legitimately too intense for younger kids but not interesting enough for older ones. And the pacing is all over the place, lurching between family comedy and gothic ghost story without committing to either.

The one redeeming quality? The sets look expensive and the mansion itself is atmospheric. But that's not enough to save 88 minutes of your life. Even kids who love the Disneyland ride will probably zone out halfway through.

If you're looking for family-friendly Halloween viewing, literally anything else—Hocus Pocus, Casper, even the 2023 Haunted Mansion remake—would be a better choice. This one's a skip unless you're a completist or hate yourself.

Age Fit

Best for kids 9-13 who can handle mild scares and won't be too bored by dated comedy. Common Sense Media suggests 10+, which tracks—younger kids will be frightened, older kids will be underwhelmed. Adults will struggle to stay awake.

WISE Breakdown

Wholesome

58

Features family togetherness and a father learning to prioritize family over work, but the execution is uneven. Eddie Murphy's workaholic character does model eventual growth, and there's cooperation among family members. However, the tone is inconsistent—veering between slapstick comedy and genuinely spooky moments that don't quite mesh. The pacing feels rushed and chaotic in places, undermining the emotional beats.

Imaginative

52

Based on the iconic Disney theme park ride, so there's inherent imaginative DNA here—haunted mansion setting, ghosts with backstories, mysterious supernatural elements. However, the film doesn't do much original with these concepts. It's derivative of better haunted house movies and feels more like a theme park tie-in than genuine creative vision. The world-building is shallow, and there's little that invites deeper exploration or sparks real curiosity beyond surface-level spookiness.

Safe

68

Rated PG with Common Sense Media suggesting age 10+. Contains spooky imagery, ghosts, some mild peril, and supernatural scares that could frighten younger viewers. There are zombies emerging from graves and some genuinely creepy moments (haunted mansion atmosphere, séances, spirits). No gore, sexual content, or strong language. The scares are Disney-level—more atmospheric than graphic—but still intense enough that sensitive kids might be unsettled. No surprise traumatic content, though the ghost story does involve death and a tragic backstory.

Enriching

42

The core message about prioritizing family over career ambition is worthwhile, but it's delivered with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer. Jim Evers learns to value his wife and kids more than closing real estate deals—a fine lesson, but executed in the most predictable way possible. Beyond that thin moral, there's minimal cognitive or emotional depth. No real skill-building, limited empathy development, and forgettable dialogue. It's entertainment (barely), but offers little lasting value or meaningful takeaways.

Parent Info

✓

Why It Might Be Great

If your kids are obsessed with the Disneyland ride, they might enjoy seeing it come to life (even if the execution is rough)
Eddie Murphy brings his signature energy, even if the script doesn't deserve it
The production design and mansion sets are genuinely impressive—it looks expensive
Teaches a straightforward lesson about work-life balance and family priorities
Halloween-season viewing option for families wanting something spooky-ish but not R-rated

⚠

What to Watch For

Legitimately creepy imagery—zombies, ghosts, haunted atmosphere—that could scare kids under 10 despite the PG rating
Early-2000s comedy that feels painfully dated; lots of jokes that land with a thud
The critical consensus is brutal for a reason—this is genuinely hard to sit through
Some mild scary peril and supernatural themes throughout

Conversation Starters

"Dad in this movie is obsessed with work—do you think grown-ups sometimes forget what's really important?"
"What would you do if you were stuck in a haunted mansion during a thunderstorm?"
"The ghosts in this movie are trapped because of something sad that happened—do you think that's scary or just sad?"
"If you could design your own haunted house ride, what would be in it?"

Deep Dive

The 2003 The Haunted Mansion is a fascinating case study in how to get a "family movie" wrong. It arrived in that early-2000s gold rush where Disney assumed any ride with a gift shop could be a multi-billion dollar blockbuster. But while other ride-to-screen adaptations found a way to balance adventure with supernatural thrills, this movie just feels confused. It wants to be an Eddie Murphy vehicle full of fast-talking riffs, yet it’s anchored to a somber, gothic backstory about lost love that belongs in a much darker film.

The Scare Factor is Weird

The biggest issue for parents isn't just the low quality—it's the vibe. Because the critics (14% on Rotten Tomatoes) and the audience (31%) both bounced off it, you might assume it's just a harmless, forgettable dud. It isn't. The makeup effects are surprisingly visceral. We’re talking about skeletal zombies in a dusty crypt that look like they wandered off the set of a much more serious horror flick.

If you're looking for age-appropriate scary movies for kids, this one is a tough sell. It lacks the whimsical charm of a "gateway" horror movie and instead leans into a dreary, claustrophobic atmosphere. For a 7-year-old, the "dead" rising from the floor isn't funny; it's nightmare-fuel. For a 12-year-old, the jokes about real estate and work-life balance are just boring.

Better Ways to Get Spooked

If your goal is to introduce your kids to the "spooky but safe" genre, there are better paths. This movie is a relic of a time when studios didn't quite know how to calibrate scary TV for kids or family horror films. It tries to please everyone and ends up pleasing almost no one.

If the kids are dead-set on a mansion story because they love the Disneyland ride, the 2023 remake (while also flawed) manages a much better balance of heart and haunts. It also features a cast that includes Owen Wilson, who has a knack for bringing a chill energy to big emotions that helps ground the supernatural chaos.

The "Fast Forward" Strategy

If you do end up watching this—perhaps because it's the only thing everyone can agree on for a rainy October Tuesday—be prepared to multitask. The middle act drags significantly as the family explores the house. The production design is the only thing worth looking at; the mansion itself is a masterclass in practical sets and atmospheric lighting. But once the plot kicks in regarding the butler and the master of the house, the dialogue becomes a slog. You aren't missing a hidden gem here. You're watching a theme park commercial that forgot to be fun.

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