Look, let's be real: this is the Pirates movie nobody asked for. By the fourth installment, the franchise had run out of creative steam, and it shows. The critics were brutal (32% on RT), audiences were lukewarm, and even die-hard fans admit this one's a slog.
The mermaid sequences are genuinely scary—like, nightmare fuel for younger kids—and Blackbeard brings a darker edge than previous villains. But the magic is gone. Jack Sparrow's shtick feels tired, the plot is a bloated mess, and at over two hours, you'll be checking your watch.
If your tweens are completists who've seen the first three and absolutely need more Pirates, fine—put it on Disney+ and let them have at it. But this isn't appointment viewing, and there's virtually nothing enriching here beyond "pirates go on quest, fight stuff, end." You're better off rewatching Curse of the Black Pearl and remembering when this franchise was actually fun.




