A few years ago, plastic surgeons started reporting a weird trend: patients weren't bringing in photos of celebrities anymore. They were bringing in selfies of themselves—but selfies heavily modified by Snapchat filters.

We’re talking about eyes that are mathematically impossible, skin with zero pores, and jawlines sharp enough to cut glass.

When a teen spends four hours a day looking at a version of themselves that has "perfect" skin and a thinner nose, the mirror starts to feel like a liar. That gap between the digital self and the physical self is where the "dysmorphia" lives. It’s the feeling that your real face is a "bad" version of your digital face.

Ask our chatbot for more details on the psychological impact of filters

It’s easy to write this off as kids being "obsessed with themselves," but that’s not really what’s happening. For a middle or high schooler, their digital identity is their identity.

Not all apps are created equal when it comes to body image. Here’s the breakdown of what your teen is likely using and how it handles the "mirror" effect.

Snapchat is the primary culprit because the camera is the app. The second you open it, you’re looking at yourself. The "Lenses" feature ranges from silly (turning into a potato) to "beautifying" (slimming the face, enlarging eyes). Since Snapchat is used for 1-to-1 communication, teens are constantly seeing filtered versions of their friends, which normalizes a look that doesn't exist in nature.

TikTok upped the ante with AI-powered filters. If you haven't seen the "Bold Glamour" filter, it’s worth a look just to see how terrifyingly seamless it is. Unlike old filters that would "glitch" if you moved your hand in front of your face, these new ones stay perfectly mapped. It makes the "fake" look indistinguishable from reality.

Instagram is less about the "live" filter and more about the "curated" life. However, with the rise of Reels, the beauty filters are now baked into the video creation process. It’s the home of "Instagram Face"—a specific look characterized by high cheekbones and cat-like eyes that has become the global standard of beauty for Gen Z.

If you're looking for an antidote, this is it. BeReal forces users to take a photo at a random time with no filters and no editing. It’s not perfect (kids still try to look "cool"), but it’s the only major app actively fighting the "Snapchat Dysmorphia" trend.

If you want to understand the visceral anxiety of being a teen in the social media era, watch this. It’s cringey, it’s painful, and it perfectly captures why a 13-year-old feels the need to perform for a camera.

Check out our guide on the best movies about social media for families

The way you handle this depends heavily on whether your kid is just starting to ask for a phone or if they're already deep in the "streak" trenches.

Don't go in with a "social media is ruining your brain" lecture. That’s the fastest way to get an eye-roll and a closed door. Instead, try being curious.

The "Why" Conversation: Instead of saying "Why do you use that filter?", try: "I noticed that filter changes your eye shape. Why do you think the app designers chose that specific look as 'the goal'?" This shifts the focus from their insecurity to the app's manipulation.

The "Real World" Check: Make sure they have "analog" time where they are seen and valued for things that have nothing to do with their face. Sports, hobbies, or even just family dinner where phones are in the "jail" box. They need to be reminded that their physical presence in a room matters more than their digital pixels.

Watch for the Red Flags: If your teen starts refusing to be in family photos without a filter, or if they seem genuinely distressed by their "raw" reflection, it might be time to step back.

Learn more about signs of social media addiction and body dysmorphia

We are the first generation of parents raising kids who have a "digital twin." That twin is always thinner, has clearer skin, and never has a bad hair day. It’s an impossible standard to live up to.

Our job isn't necessarily to "fix" the apps—we can't—but to be the voice of reality. We need to be the ones telling them that "Ohio" (weird/cringe) is actually okay, and that a face with pores and imperfections is the only one that can actually feel a hug or a breeze.

Filters are a fun toy until they become a requirement for existing online. Keep the conversation open, keep the "BeReal" moments frequent, and remember that even if they say you’re being "extra," they’re listening.

Ask our chatbot for a script on how to talk to your teen about filters