TL;DR: His & Hers is a pitch-black psychological thriller that’s currently blowing up thanks to a brand-new Netflix adaptation starring Tessa Thompson and Jon Bernthal. While it’s a page-turner, it deals with heavy-duty themes like sexual grooming, sexual assault, and extreme gaslighting. This is strictly 17+ territory. If your teen is into "Dark Romance" or BookTok thrillers like Verity, they’ve probably heard of it—but you’ll want to read the fine print before they hit "play."
Originally a 2020 novel by Alice Feeney, His & Hers is a "he-said, she-said" mystery set in a small town where everyone is lying. The story follows Anna, a high-functioning alcoholic news reporter, and Jack, a detective who also happens to be her ex-husband. They’re both investigating a murder, both are hiding massive secrets, and both are—to put it lightly—unreliable narrators.
The Netflix show leans hard into the "Atlanta heat" noir vibe, but the core of the story remains a deeply disturbing look at childhood trauma and how it ripples into adulthood. It’s the kind of show that makes Gone Girl look like a rom-com.
If you feel like you're suddenly seeing this title everywhere, it's because the "Feeney-verse" has officially collided with the Netflix algorithm. About 15% of high schoolers are already deep into the "thriller-to-dark-romance" pipeline on TikTok, where books like this are treated as "must-reads" for the aesthetic.
With the star power of Tessa Thompson and the production backing of Jessica Chastain, this isn't just a niche book anymore—it’s a cultural moment. Your older teens might see it as "just another mystery," but the content is significantly more graphic than your standard episode of Law & Order.
This isn't just a "who-done-it." It's a "why-did-they-do-this-to-themselves-and-others." Here is what is actually in the mix:
The most significant "red flag" for parents is the backstory. The plot reveals that the female characters were groomed by a peer and eventually sold for sex to older men during their teen years. There are depictions of gang rape and sexual coercion that are central to the characters' motivations. It is handled with a "thriller" lens, which can sometimes feel more exploitative than educational.
Alcoholism and Grief
Anna is a "high-functioning" alcoholic who uses wine to numb the pain of losing her infant daughter to SIDS. The depiction of her addiction is raw and, at times, difficult to watch. If your family has a history with these issues, this will be a major trigger.
Both leads lie to the reader/viewer constantly. While this makes for a great twist, it also means the "truth" is always shifting. For younger viewers, this can be confusing and makes it harder to parse out what healthy behavior actually looks like.
Animal Cruelty
There are brief but disturbing mentions of harm to animals (specifically a cat) used as a way to show a character's sociopathy. For many kids (and adults), this is a hard "no."
Ages 0-14: Hard No. There is zero reason for a middle schooler to be near this. The themes of sexual violence and the complexity of the adult relationships are way beyond their developmental pay grade.
Ages 15-16: Proceed with Extreme Caution. If you have a very mature 10th or 11th grader who is already reading adult thrillers, they might be asking for this. However, the grooming themes are intense. We recommend reading a full plot summary first so you aren't blindsided by the twists.
Ages 17+: Parent's Choice. At this age, many kids are already consuming this level of content. The best move here is co-viewing or discussing the book after they finish it. Use it as a springboard for conversations about consent and how trauma manifests.
If your teen is dead-set on watching the Netflix series, here are a few ways to open the dialogue without sounding like a lecture:
- The "Grooming" Conversation: "The show deals with some pretty dark stuff regarding how those girls were treated in high school. Do you feel like the show makes it clear that what happened to them was a crime, or does it just feel like a plot twist?"
- Media Literacy: "Both Anna and Jack lie to us the whole time. Why do you think the author chose to make them so unlikable? Does it make you trust them less as the story goes on?"
- The "Dark Romance" Trend: "I see this book all over TikTok. What is it about these 'dark' stories that everyone is obsessed with right now?"
His & Hers is a masterclass in suspense, but it’s also a masterclass in "not for children." It’s a brutal, cynical, and often upsetting story. If your teen is looking for a mystery, there are plenty of others that don't involve adolescent grooming as a primary plot point.
If they must watch it, make sure you're there to help them process the ending—because it’s the kind of "twist" that leaves you feeling a little bit grimy.
- Check the Wise Score: Head over to the His & Hers media page to see how other intentional parents have rated the content.
- Find an Alternative: If this feels too dark, check out A Good Girl's Guide to Murder for a mystery that’s much more age-appropriate for the 14-16 crowd.
- Talk it out: Use our guide to talking about sexual violence in media to prepare for the heavier themes.
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