If you managed to get through school without reading this one, here is the "spark-notes-at-pickup" version: 12-year-old Jonas lives in a "perfect" society where there is no war, no hunger, and no pain. But there’s also no color, no music, and no real choice. It’s called "Sameness."

Every kid gets a "Life Assignment" at age 12. Jonas is chosen to be the Receiver of Memory. He starts meeting with an old man (The Giver) who transfers all the memories of the world—the good stuff like sunshine and sledding, but also the horrific stuff like war and starvation—into Jonas.

As Jonas realizes that his "perfect" world is actually built on a foundation of ignorance and some pretty dark secrets, he has to decide whether to stay in the safety of the community or risk everything to escape.

Lois Lowry wrote this in 1993, long before every teen movie involved a girl in a leather jacket fighting a corrupt government. It matters because it’s often the first time a middle schooler is asked to consider: Is safety worth more than freedom?

In our current world of algorithmic "Sameness"—where our TikTok feeds and YouTube recommendations are designed to show us exactly what we already like—the idea of a world where you never have to make a difficult choice feels weirdly relevant. Your kid might not be living in a black-and-white community, but they are living in a digital world that tries to curate their reality for them.

Ask our chatbot how to discuss "filter bubbles" with your tween

Let’s talk about the parts that usually make parents do a double-take when they see this on the 6th-grade reading list.

In the book, when people get too old, or if a baby isn't thriving, they are "released" to "Elsewhere." For most of the book, it sounds like a peaceful retirement or a move to another town. Then comes the scene where Jonas watches a video of his father (a Nurturer) performing a release on a newborn twin.

Spoiler alert: "Release" is lethal injection. The scene is clinical, cold, and devastating. It’s not "action-movie" violence; it’s "quiet-horror" violence. It’s designed to show how a society that loses its empathy becomes capable of anything.

Around age 12, Jonas starts having "dreams" (basically puberty-induced attraction). The community calls these "The Stirrings." The solution? Everyone has to take a daily pill to suppress these feelings. It’s a very clinical way of discussing sexual development and the government’s desire to control human biology. It’s not graphic, but it’s a great entry point for talking about why feelings—even the messy ones—are part of being human.

If your kid finished the book and is actually (shocker) interested in reading more, or if they need a visual to help process the themes, here are the best ways to keep the conversation going.

If you have a reluctant reader or a kid who is very visual, this is a fantastic adaptation. The way the illustrator handles the transition from black-and-white to color as Jonas receives memories is exactly how it should be experienced.

I’ll be honest: the movie is... fine. They aged the characters up from 12 to 16 (probably to make the "Stirrings" more of a YA romance subplot), which changes the vibe significantly. However, it stars Jeff Bridges and Meryl Streep, and even features a random Taylor Swift cameo. It’s worth a family movie night just to compare it to the book.

Most people don’t realize The Giver is actually a quartet. Gathering Blue is the second book. It’s not a direct sequel with Jonas, but it takes place in a different community that is the opposite of Jonas’s—instead of high-tech and clinical, it’s primitive and cruel. It’s a great look at how different societies "dispose" of the vulnerable.

If you have an older teen (it’s rated PG-13 for some sexual content and language), this movie is the perfect visual companion to The Giver. It’s about two 90s teens who get sucked into a 1950s black-and-white sitcom. As the characters start to feel real emotions and challenge the status quo, the world starts turning to color.

Check out our guide to more "dystopian lite" books for tweens

Recommended Age: 11+ (Grades 6-8)

Community Data: According to our latest Screenwise survey, roughly 72% of parents report their children read The Giver as part of a school curriculum rather than for pleasure. If your kid is reading it for school, they might be "over it" by the time they get home, so keep the conversations low-pressure.

The biggest "issue" parents usually have with The Giver isn't the violence—it's the ending. It’s ambiguous. Jonas and the baby, Gabriel, are on a sled, freezing, hearing music, and seeing a house with Christmas lights.

Some readers think they made it to a real place (Elsewhere). Others think they are hallucinating and dying of hypothermia.

Lois Lowry has said she likes that it's ambiguous, but if your kid is the type who needs a "happily ever after" or a concrete resolution, they might find the ending incredibly frustrating. You might need to mention that the later books in the series, specifically Messenger and Son, actually provide some answers.

If you want to have a real conversation that doesn't feel like a school quiz, try these:

The Giver is a masterpiece for a reason. It’s not "brain rot." It’s a challenging, uncomfortable, and ultimately hopeful book that respects a kid's ability to handle big, scary ideas.

It’s the perfect "gateway drug" to critical thinking. If your kid is reading it, don't just let them finish it and toss it aside—ask them what they think about the sled. Their answer will tell you a lot about how they see the world.

Learn more about why middle schoolers are obsessed with dystopian fiction